Parashat Chayei Sarah
Merav Rozenblum, Hebrew Teacher
This week’s portion starts with a funeral. There have been so many of these in our Israeli community these past 13 months. Rabbi Binyamin Lau says that when we attend a funeral, we can’t help but observe the other people and try to identify the close family circle: the parents, siblings, children, life partners, and close friends.
The funeral here is Sarah’s. There is her husband, Avraham: וַיָּבֹא֙ אַבְרָהָ֔ם לִסְפֹּ֥ד לְשָׂרָ֖ה וְלִבְכֹּתָֽהּ׃ “and Abraham proceeded to mourn for Sarah and to bewail her”. (Genesis 23, 2). But wait, where is Isaac, her beloved son? The one she had at such an old age that she couldn’t believe it was possible? How come he did not join his father in eulogizing her? Show respect to his mother? One of the most horrific two-word combinations in Hebrew this past year is הותר לפרסום, “it has been permitted to be publicized”. This is the heart-piercing preface to the name of a soldier who died in battle or a hostage who died in captivity. Could it be possible that Isaac hasn’t heard the breaking news of his mother’s passing?
Rabbi Bahya (Spain 1050-1120) admits it might be the case. The last we heard from Isaac was right after the traumatic story of his binding. The Torah told us then that Avraham returned by himself to his servants, whom he and Isaac left earlier to approach the destination of the binding: וַיָּ֤שׇׁב אַבְרָהָם֙ אֶל־נְעָרָ֔יו וַיָּקֻ֛מוּ וַיֵּלְכ֥וּ יַחְדָּ֖ו אֶל־בְּאֵ֣ר שָׁ֑בַע וַיֵּ֥שֶׁב אַבְרָהָ֖ם בִּבְאֵ֥ר שָֽׁבַע “Abraham then returned to his servants, and they departed together for Beer-sheba; and Abraham stayed in Beer-sheba” (Genesis 22,19). Rabbi Bahya believes that Isaac stays in the Moriah region. Traumatized by the experience, he keeps his distance from his father, who was willing to sacrifice him to prove his belief in God. Isaac has been a nomad since then for nearly three years, and in this week’s portion we find out that he arrived at Beer Lachai Roi. This is the same place to which Hagar, who after being abused by Sarah, escaped in the portion we read a couple of weeks ago. There, a messenger of God finds Hagar and calls on her to go back to her owner, promising her that the child she is bearing, Ishmael, will become a great nation. Hagar is grateful to be seen by God, and thankful for the opportunity to see beyond the present moment, into her future. She exclaims: אַתָּ֖ה אֵ֣ל רֳאִ֑י “You are God who sees me”, and adds
הֲגַ֥ם הֲלֹ֛ם רָאִ֖יתִי אַחֲרֵ֥י רֹאִֽי׃ “here I saw in addition to being seen by God” (Genesis 16, 13). Hence the place is named Beer Lachai Roi, which can be translated as “a well to the life of the one who sees me”.
Interestingly, the Hebrew word for a well (of water) באר is the root that also means “to interpret”, to offer an explanation. Maybe this is what draws Isaac to the same area – lonely and alienated from his parents, he is searching for clarity and understanding of what had happened to him on the mount of Moriah. He needs to see the events of the past in a new light, but also see what the future holds for him. Rabbi Lau calls Beer Lachai Roi “the place where one looks into the beyond”. And so, after what might have been a moment of epiphany, we see Isaac for the first time in this portion, in a serene, idealistic moment and state of being: וְיִצְחָק֙ בָּ֣א מִבּ֔וֹא בְּאֵ֥ר לַחַ֖י רֹאִ֑י… וַיֵּצֵ֥א יִצְחָ֛ק לָשׂ֥וּחַ בַּשָּׂדֶ֖ה לִפְנ֣וֹת עָ֑רֶב וַיִּשָּׂ֤א עֵינָיו֙ וַיַּ֔רְא וְהִנֵּ֥ה גְמַלִּ֖ים בָּאִֽים׃ “Isaac had just come back from the vicinity of Beer-lahai-roi… And Isaac went out walking in the field toward evening and, looking up, he saw camels approaching.“ (Genesis 24, 62).
This caravan Isaac is seeing is carrying his future wife, Rebekah, whom Avraham’s servant is bringing home, to carry on his master’s lineage. A dramatic meeting of the bride-to-be follows. It is only now that Sarah’s name is finally mentioned in connection with Isaac. וַיְבִאֶ֣הָ יִצְחָ֗ק הָאֹ֙הֱלָה֙ שָׂרָ֣ה אִמּ֔וֹ וַיִּקַּ֧ח אֶת־רִבְקָ֛ה וַתְּהִי־ל֥וֹ לְאִשָּׁ֖ה וַיֶּאֱהָבֶ֑הָ וַיִּנָּחֵ֥ם יִצְחָ֖ק אַחֲרֵ֥י אִמּֽוֹ׃ “Isaac then brought [Rebekah] into the tent of his mother Sarah, and he took Rebekah as his wife. Isaac loved her, and thus found comfort after his mother’s death (Genesis 24, 67).
It is only now, it seems, after gaining some new interpretation of painful past events, and seeing the prospects of his new life with Rebekah, that he is ready to face the tragic news of his mother’s passing and grieve for her. Sarah can now rest in peace.
In loving memory of Karen Conklin and Sara Jo Chaplen, my sisters-in-law by marriage and friendship.
